“Maybe at the bottom,” said a misty-eyed Wall, digging deep into the ornamental stocking in search for even one ounce of coal. “No, nothing, and I was so good this year!”
This is only the most recent of many Christmases where the Saskatchewan Premier has received an assortment of small presents rather than compressed carbon, and an inconsolable Wall has now shut himself in his room.
“Just leave me alone!” sobbed Wall, declining his wife Tami’s offer to come down for her famous Christmas morning pancakes. “It’s not fair, Kathleen Wynne got the privatized hydro she asked for. I’m the only premier in the whole world who didn’t get what they wanted.”
Gifts Wall received in his stocking this year included a shoe shining kit, a ‘#1 Premier’ mug’, and a novelty tie with pieces of coal on it, which while Wall admitted was “pretty good I guess” was still not the shovelful of coal that had topped his Christmas list this year and every year as far back as he could remember.
By 10am Wall had begun to calm down, but flew into a tantrum once again after opening a bottle of natural gas gifted by his mother with the note “I hope this is the one you wanted.”