WINNIPEG – According to living room sources, unemployed Winnipeg resident and generally useless individual Andrew Rowley will spend the entire afternoon lying on his couch and reflecting upon his morning, the majority of which he also spent on his couch.
Rowley, who lives with his aunt and doesn’t seem to have any plans beyond where he will get his next sandwich, was reached for comment earlier in the day. When asked to go into detail about his plans, Rowley responded with “Hmmmm…”
He later added, “Let’s see…”
Based on recent trends, the thinking may eventually be combined with beer and could continue late into the evening.