TORONTO - Canadian business magnate and television personality Kevin O’Leary is looking forward to beginning his internship at Business News Network next week.
CALGARY - An addendum to the damming report of the Auditor General of Alberta on former Premier Alison Redford’s expenses has revealed that, in addition to the malfeasance that drove her from office, her resignation letter itself cost the province many thousands of dollars.
OTTAWA - With the 2015 elections fast approaching, Justin Trudeau is preparing to release a meditative, compelling autobiography composed entirely of photographs of the Liberal party leader.
WINNIPEG - The RCMP is looking for a hitchhiking robot believed to be responsible for several killings along the Trans-Canada highway from Nova Scotia to BC.
OTTAWA - With the release of Justin Trudeau’s biography just around the corner, early readers have been surprised by the Liberal leader’s honest, lengthy, and exclusive discussion of hair products.
NIAGARA FALLS, ON - A new report from controversial amusement park, Marineland, has revealed that almost all their aquatic animals are living in their own tears.
MONTREAL -- Minister of Public Safety Steve Blaney has accused Justin Trudeau of being a radical Islamist after the Liberal leader allegedly purchased, and consumed, a Middle Eastern dish known as “shawarma.”
Dandong, China - Two married Canadian nationals accused of stealing state secrets from the Chinese government have admitted to the act of subterfuge, but have claimed that the only secrets they discovered were ones China had stolen from the Canadian government through its cyber spying program.
Polley Lake, BC - The CEO of the mining company that is responsible for contaminating several BC lakes with arsenic, lead, mercury and other heavy metals, is assuring the public that he knows his cousin is really good with fixing contaminated water.
TORONTO - In a controversial move, the Church known for its liberal and inclusive tendencies has implemented a minimum height requirement for all members.