REDMOND, WA – Microsoft’s search engine Bing revealed its most searched items for the month of January, with the search phrase “google” coming in first a record 28th straight m...
Conservatives want to appeal BC’s assisted suicide ruling
The federal government is looking to appeal a British Columbia Supreme Court ruling that struck down Canada’s ban on assisted suicide. What’s your say? “I worked for years to get that ban ...
Flaherty’s face now primary measure of Canada’s economy
OTTAWA – As Canada’s economic outlook grows increasingly unpredictable and difficult to understand, media outlets across the country are turning to Finance Minister Jim Flaherty’s varied facial ...
Blackberry ordered to pay big fine
Blackberry maker, Research in Motion, was told to pay $147 million after losing a patent case in California. What’s your say? “Pay them in RIM stock. That’ll teach ‘em.” Simon Woohne...
Murder mystery party ends in actual murder
WINNIPEG, MB – A murder mystery party among friends and acquaintances took a turn for the worse when one guest actually killed another guest as part of the game. Rupert Carpathia, a 28-year old ...
Imaginary friend from childhood now unemployed, just needs a place to crash
BARRIE, ON – Recent graduate Kyle Parsons, 23, was taken aback this week by the reappearance of his imaginary childhood friend, Silly Pete, who showed up on Parson’s doorstep with a suitcase, pi...
Rest of world collectively agrees that Spanish and Portuguese are basically the same language
NEW YORK – In a rare moment of near unanimity, the member states of the United Nations General Assembly came together yesterday afternoon passing a motion affirming the fundamental belief that S...
Harvey’s employee refuses to make burger Stephanie’s ‘stupid fucking’ way
BOWMANVILLE, ON – Long time Harvey’s employee Rick Mauran is facing an internal employment review, and possible disciplinary action, after he refused to make a burger to customer Stephanie Harris’ exa...
NDP asks to be included on mailing list for future murder-dismemberments
OTTAWA – Yesterday, NDP leader Thomas Mulcair sent a stern and clear message to any future murderers and dismemberers who wish to attract the public spotlight: next time, please include the NDP....
Unpaid intern quits for lucrative sweatshop position
SHENZHEN, CHINA – Amir Robinson, 24, quit his unpaid internship with a small Canadian television station last week for a much better paying position assembling wallets in an overseas sweatshop. ...
