TORONTO – At a scrum in front of his office, Toronto mayor Rob Ford admitted that a year ago, in one of his drunken stupors, he may have tried municipal politics. Ford’s erratic behaviour, …
Toronto
Rob Ford denies the existence of Chief Blair
TORONTO – After being questioned about the previously elusive crack video now in possession by Police Chief Bill Blair, Mayor Rob Ford vehemently denied the existence of the “alleged” head of the…
REPORT: Still unclear if mound of rubble is part of construction work or Nuit Blanche
TORONTO – Days after the Nuit Blanche arts festival, Toronto residents are still not sure whether an especially scenic pile of rubble is part of the city’s ongoing construction work, or if …
Toronto Police Association: It’s a sad day when an officer can get charged just for beating the fuck out of somebody for no goddamn reason
TORONTO – representatives of the Toronto Police Association say that they are “shocked” and “saddened” that Constable Babak Andalib-Goortani has been found guilty in the brutal assault of G…
TIFF celebrities excited to catch glimpse of Rob Ford
TORONTO, ON – As the Toronto International Film Festival gets underway, more and more celebrities have been spotted outside of City Hall, hoping for a glimpse of the city’s most famous citi…
Toronto Star begins paywall website, hopes no one knows how to clear internet history
TORONTO – After several other renowned newspapers implemented paywalls for internet content, publishers at the Toronto Star are hoping that none of their online readers know how to clear th…
Deafening military flyovers of airshow exciting novelty for city that has never been bombed
TORONTO – Following a week of ceremonial flyovers by Canada’s elite Snowbirds, Toronto residents have reported greatly enjoying the noise and spectacle of seeing CT-114 Tutor fighter planes…
Drug-fueled former athlete defeats Hulk Hogan in arm-wrestling match
TORONTO – As part of the annual pop culture spectacle Fan Expo Canada, Rob ‘The Mayor’ Ford today defeated former WWE wrestler Hulk Hogan in an arm-wrestling bout. Despite today’s defeat, a…
Toronto police admit the ninth bullet was a bit unnecessary
TORONTO – In response to the fatal shooting of 18 year-old Sammy Yatim on a streetcar this past weekend, Toronto Police Services admitted today that the ninth round fired was a tad unnecess…
