by The Beaverton Editorial Board There are times when journalists of principle must raise their voices to stand up for what is right. This is not one of those times. There are also times when a m…
Editorial
Editorial: Trump underestimates how proud, united and, most importantly, petty Canadians are
By: Chris Standin President Trump has gone ahead with his long rumoured plans to put a 25% tariff on all Canadian goods sold in the United States (other than energy, which got 10%). He believes h…
EDITORIAL: Why my cheque giveaway is great whereas Doug Ford’s cheque giveaway is desperate and terrible – by Justin Trudeau
Hello. It’s me, Canada’s most popular Prime Minister, Justin Trudeau. Here to tell you all the good news – that I feel your pain. I don’t mean feel your pain in a literal …
Editorial: Five ways to use your huge bazongas as literal weapons in the Woke War, by the National Post
by The National Post You heard it here first, Canadians: the death of wokeness lies in a gorgeous set of organic, locally-sourced bazongas. We at The National Post have compiled a full list of mi…
Editorial: Women must date unpleasant men, and we’re not just saying that because we’re unpleasant men
By The Beaverton Editorial Board A spectre is haunting dating – the spectre of women not dating men like us. Dating and marriage used to be simple. A man chose a woman, her father approved,…
You fucking Leafs fans still think I’m the worst Defenceman you’ve ever seen?
By Justin Holl Well well well, look how quickly that shit fucking changed didn’t it you platinum seat suit wearing fucks? For the past 3 years all I’ve heard from you Wendel Clark lov…
EDITORIAL: Why I’m not letting my kids use social media except the YouTube channel they star in that pays our mortgage
By Ashley Drin Today’s children are under more scrutiny than ever, thanks to the toxic forces of social media. The endless, crushing pressure to expose their most vulnerable moments, private thou…
Editorial: I protested at Trudeau’s Belleville visit and personally saw him eat six babies
by PierrePoilievreStan43 Listen up, you left-wing commies, my friends and I have been getting a lot of shit for exercising our God-given right to protest at Traitor Trudeau’s Belleville Lie-A-Tho…
Editorial: With news blocked on Facebook, we the Beaverton are now the sole arbiters of truth
By The Beaverton Editorial Staff, aka Supreme Rulers of Truth and Fact Greetings subjects! As you may have read, back in the Before Times when factual news articles weren’t yet banned from this s…
Editorial: My home business is the result of 1% inspiration and 99% denying I’m the victim of a pyramid scheme
by Maria Lawson Hey Huns, I wanted to write to you all and tell you about this amazing new opportunity that allows you to work from home, be your own boss, have a life, feel empowered, meet lots …
