OTTAWA – Following a controversial performance by The Tenors at the MLB All-Star Game, in which singer Remigio Pereira inserted the phrase “All Lives Matter” into the Canadian national anth…
National
Tony Clement launches campaign from steps of very nice gazebo
Orrville, ON — Former federal and provincial cabinet minister Tony Clement has announced his bid to lead the Conservative Party of Canada from one of his favourite gazebos. “I have the expe…
Public Service Pay Centre accidentally pays employee $2.7 billion in provincial transfer payments
OTTAWA – After a series of clerical and accounting errors, the Public Service Pay Centre, Canada’s centralized payment facility for public servants, has accidentally compensated a federal e…
Calgary Stampede cowboy euthanized after chuckwagon race injury
CALGARY – Calgary Stampede employees were forced to put down a prize cowboy Friday night after he sustained a leg injury during a chuckwagon race. The 42 year-old male Caucasian, named ‘Sid…
Hungover Justin Trudeau shows parliament Bill Nye video
OTTAWA – After an eventful night at the Byward Market that left him with a throbbing headache, former schoolteacher Justin Trudeau opted to take it easy the following morning and just show …
Tory refugee Jason Kenney treks thousands of kilometers westward to seek better life
OTTAWA – Former Conservative MP Jason Kenney has made the decision to flee Ottawa and make a perilous 3,500 km journey across dangerous territory to seek a new life in Alberta. After the Li…
Pride Parade joins Justin Trudeau’s walk down street
TORONTO – Prime Minister and National Treasure Justin Trudeau was accompanied by Canada’s largest Pride Parade as he casually strolled down Yonge Street this past Sunday. “OM Fucking G; it’…
Trudeau demands China improve human rights before trading, ‘unless they want to buy some tanks’
VANCOUVER – This week Prime Minister Justin Trudeau said China will need to improve its record on human rights before Canada will sign a Free Trade Agreement with them, before emphasizing t…
Pride parade interrupted by Black Lives Matter halted by Greenpeace cut off by PETA stopped by BDS
TORONTO – Toronto’s annual Pride Parade was interrupted Sunday by a group of activists, themselves interrupted by other protesters who, in turn, were interrupted by other activists. Black L…
Obama, Nieto to increase tariffs by 12% unless Trudeau eats scorpion in tequila bottle
OTTAWA – Reports from the Three Amigos Summit yesterday indicated that the leaders of Mexico and the USA had threatened to increase tariffs 12% unless Prime Minister Trudeau quit being a bi…
