WASHINGTON – With the US government shut down, the National Security Agency is appealing to Americans to monitor the activity and conversations of their family, neighbors, colleagues and foreign …
Blue Jays playing last game to catch up to Expos
TORONTO – The Blue Jays’ playoff push may have ended 160 games ago but on the baseball season’s final day, there is still hope that they can finish ahead of the Montreal Expos. “It’s been a…
Local man excited the whole thing in Syria is over
MILTON – After weeks of worrying, Timothy Pond was relieved to hear the whole situation in Syria had been solved. Pond, a 46-year-old construction worker from Milton, believes the chemical disarm…
Harper vows to work closely with CRA to ensure future corruption occurs only internally
OTTAWA – The Harper Government is responding to the recent Revenue Canada Agency scandal in which nearly $400,000 in rebates was issued to a member of a reputed mobster by promising to work…
Political science major knows he could have handled Kenyan hostage crisis better
VANCOUVER – A third year political science student at the University of British Columbia is certain that the recent terrorist attack at a mall in Nairobi would have been resolved faster and…
Report: Canadian job growth slow due to HR
OTTAWA – A report by Statistics Canada has revealed that Canadian job growth has stalled because Human Resource departments don’t have the time to deal with backlog. “There is no lack of wo…
Woman befriends other woman over mutual hatred of third woman
CALGARY – Margaret Walsh, a secretary at an HR firm solidified her friendship with co-worker, Linda Desroches, last Friday through their mutual contempt for another colleague. “I always liked Li…
Andrei Markov excited to miss most of Canadiens’ season with this year’s injury
BROSSARD, QC – With preseason hockey in full swing Montreal Canadiens defenseman Andrei Markov is excited to find out what injury will sideline him for the majority of the season this year…
Study: 90% of yuppies think seasons change when Starbucks starts serving pumpkin-spiced lattes
NEW YORK – The fall equinox is on September 22 but according to a new study, most yuppies believe the autumn begins when they first consume a pumpkin-spiced latte. “People notice the change…
New Montreal Metro stations to be named after prominent, secular saints
MONTREAL – After announcing the extension of the Montreal Metro’s Blue Line, the PQ provincial government and Société de transport de Montréal announced that new stations will be named afte…
