Worker bees unionize - The Beaverton

Worker bees unionize

MEDICINE HAT, AB – For the first time in apiary history, worker are organizing to stand up for their basic rights.

“People think bees don’t need to sleep,” said Worker Bee #458909. “We just don’t get much opportunity because of our exploitative working conditions.”

#458909 also spoke about the need for political reform, demanding that the queen allow her hive to become a constitutional monarchy.

“You’d think that when your boss is your mother, you would feel safe at work, said Worker Bee #47892577. “But it’s repulsive how this government has scaled back benefits to injured veterans, which, since we’re bees, is every single veteran.”

“You know, because of that thing where our stingers fall out.”

In addition to demanding better hours and pay, the hive is speaking out against the government, who has used what they call ‘anti-immigration rhetoric’ against africanized bees.

At press time, Prime Minister Trudeau had agreed to meet with the head of the Committee of Worker Bees, as well as with the Committee’s thorax and abdomen.

With files by Rob Ito