SILICON VALLEY – American Tech CEOs issued a chilling warning that Chinese AI models have the potential to destroy the world more quickly and more cheaply than their American counterparts.
The CEOs took time out from calculating how many developers, designers, and artists they could render homeless in the next five years to issue a joint statement demanding that American companies be blocked from using Chinese AIs because they pose a risk to the security of their various apocalyptic forecasts.
“I have deep concerns about AI models produced in China,” said Dario Amodei from Anthropic. “Mostly that they can wreak devastation better than mine, and I won’t make any money.”
Sam Altman of OpenAI added: “The truly awful thing about the Chinese AI code is that they brazenly steal other people’s work and repackage it as their own – which is ChatGPT’s entire business model!”
The consensus among the CEOs was that Chinese AIs had the potential to accelerate global warming through rampant energy use, and when combined with the millions of unemployed workers destabilizing the world economy it would bring about a civilization collapse by 2040 – a full decade earlier than the American target.
The final line of the joint statement read: “If billions of people are going to die of starvation and war it is imperative it is done in a freedom-loving American way, not a communist Chinese way.”
At press time China was working on an AI virtual Tech CEO, but it was still exhibiting too much compassion and humanity to be released.
