CALGARY — In an unprecedented level of betrayal, Simone Walkins was excluded by several women, whom she thought to be her closest friends, from a Mud Run – an activity they know she despises.
Walkins was made aware of the deception via instagram, where she saw Emily Gregg, Sasha Ableman, and Sonia Patel participating in a Mud Run, an activity that Walkins has described as, “so disgusting” on more than one occasion.
“I just can’t believe they intentionally and very publicly left me out of a plan that I definitely wouldn’t have agreed to had they asked me,” stated a tearful Walkins as she stared down at instagram posts of the girls crawling through dirty ground water, “ya, that looks gross but I still would’ve appreciated an invite.”
Walkins spent the afternoon at home fuming, wondering why, after clearly stating, “mud runs are for dumb idiots,” they didn’t think to ask her to come.
When asked to comment Patel stated, “one time Simone said, in lurid detail, that she’d sooner gauge her eyes out with a rusty spoon than sign up for a Mud Run so we just didn’t tell her about it.”
“I get that she wants to feel acknowledged but she hates so many things we don’t know what she’ll actually show up to,” noted Abelman.
According to Walkins this isn’t the first time her friends have excluded her, last month they didn’t ask her to come to a soap making class because she’d previously said it was, “for anti-vaxxers and reiki freaks” and a year ago they didn’t include her in an axe-throwing outing because she once said, “Axe-throwing? Nope, this isn’t the wild frontier.”
“I don’t care if you’re getting your gall-bladder removed or if it’s your grandmother’s cremation, I won’t go, but I want an invite nonetheless,” stated Walkins definitively.
At press time, Walkins noted that had they invited her she definitely would’ve said maybe, strung them along, and bailed at the last minute.