Wellness fail! This infant thinks breastmilk counts as clean eating - The Beaverton

Wellness fail! This infant thinks breastmilk counts as clean eating

Between tracking down organic produce, making sure our diets have the right amount of nutrients, and keeping an eye out for pesky GMOs, clean eating can be hard for many of us. But sadly, the temptations of processed foods combined with the sophisticated marketing machine of big lead many of us to make irresponsible dietary choices. Most recently, ’s 6-month-old Joseph “Joey” Thane chose a rationalization so many of us have made—that breastmilk can be incorporated into a clean eating lifestyle.

And, truthfully, who among us can say they haven’t been there. One day, we commit to avoiding toxic processed foods such as white bread, and applesauce that dada makes and feels so good in our tummy. But, sooner or later, we come across an emotional obstacle that tests our resolve, like that time the fan above our crib stopped moving, or when mama took the cat into our room where we could look at it but then it left.

Perhaps stress was behind Joey’s decision, or perhaps–like thousands of babies–he was just uninformed. The idea of breastmilk sounds clean. Breastmilk usually contains no added salt, pesticides or artificial sweeteners, and it feels nice when we burp. But breastmilk, no matter how good the source, is made by humans, and most humans contain tons of harmful toxins. Is that worth the brief rush breastmilk can provide us, especially if it’s bedtime and our sleep sack is warm and dry? Yeah, I don’t think so either.

We might find ourselves, at the end of a long day, tempted by the idea of suckling at the teat of our mommy. (Or, if we don’t understand individuated personhood yet, suckling at the teat of a benevolent human-shaped being.) But at the end of the day, when you feel like going for the breastmilk, why not have a healthier alternative, like seven almonds, or apple cider vinegar? If you absolutely must have something to drink, opt for breastwater.

Whatever you do, don’t forget to ask yourself this very important question: are you eating this because it’s what your body really needs? Or are you just eating it because it’s the only thing you have ever eaten or know how to eat?