Quiz: Should you go Camping, Glamping, or Jamping, a term I just made up and will gradually define over the quiz? - The Beaverton

Quiz: Should you go Camping, Glamping, or Jamping, a term I just made up and will gradually define over the quiz?

Everybody likes to enjoy the great outdoors. Some like to rough it while camping. Some like to enjoy the high scale comforts of glamping. Some like jamping, a word designed to fit the structure of the quiz, whose meaning will become apparent as we write at least 300 words about it.

1. How do you sleep best?
On the cold, hard ground. Even better if there are sticks and stones poking into my back
I sleep best on an innerspring, memory foam mattress preferably with some sort of monogamy and velvet canopy
Hanging upside down surrounded by acrobats making whale sounds
2. What is your favourite food?
Potatoes and onions slow roasted in the coals of a fire and full of dirt
I usually get the tasting menu at the campsite
Hot dogs. No that’s too much like camping. Blood. Human blood
3. Who is you personal hero?
The guy that cut off his own arm after it got stuck underneath a rock for 127 hours
Gwyneth Paltrow. But not as an actor, only as an intellectual
Tough one. Jack Layton seems like a safe choice. But he can’t have a moustache, only clean shaven Jack Layton
4. How do you like to exercise?
Desperately fighting for my life as I navigate through rapids
Slowly wandering through climate controlled shrubbery
Rapid contraction of muscles in manner that increases heart rate. Man I’m so good at making these up
5. What would you rather do?
Build a campfire
Pay someone else a hundred dollars to build a fire for me
Shave Jack Layton
6. How do you feel about strangers on your weekend away?
Love ’em! If there was a way to hear everything strangers say and do through a thin sheet of canvas I would be so happy
If they can afford to go glamping then I consider them peers, not strangers
What’s something that’s different to the other two? After the equinox good. Before the equinox bad. Nailed it
7. Where do you get your equipment?
MEC
Harrods
Inside my jamping truck that has been handed down, generation from generation
8. You get lost and are stranded with no water, no food, no phone. What is your first course of action?
I would climb the highest tree to survey the area, then I would start a fire with green leaves so the smoke would attract help and then finally I would drink my own urine
Send one of the sherpas to go get help and/or cucumber infused coconut water
As any Jamper would know it is impossible to ever truly be lost because we are all on the path that we are meant to be on. Also I have lots of my own blood to drink
Quiz: Should you go Camping, Glamping, or Jamping, a term I just made up and will gradually define over the quiz?
You Should Go Camping!
You enjoy experiencing nature and the perpetual discomfort that it brings. Enjoy a weekend of being too cold, then too hot and then too cold again.
Quiz: Should you go Camping, Glamping, or Jamping, a term I just made up and will gradually define over the quiz?
You Should Go Glamping!
You enjoy paying $500 for what is essentially a shitty hotel inside canvas. Somehow you gentrified a yurt.
Quiz: Should you go Camping, Glamping, or Jamping, a term I just made up and will gradually define over the quiz?
You Should Go Jamping!
This is embarrassing but I just googled it and jamping is a real thing. It means Jeep camping. Luckily Jeep camping brings together your love of clean shaven Jack Layton, sleeping near acrobats, human blood and generic exercise.
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