MOSCOW, RUSSIA – After a high scoring 4 – 2 victory over Croatia in the 2018 World Cup finals, the entire nation of France announced Sunday that it finally embrace certain immigrants, or children of immigrants, who have proven themselves useful.
While many on the French World Cup team are in fact born in France as full French citizens, including goal scorers Paul Pogba and Kylian Mbappé, other French citizens report they, “look like immigrants,” or say, “their parents are immigrants,” and that that’s, “basically the same.” That attitude is expected to change with this new World Cup achievement.
“Is it absolutely wrong to discriminate against someone just because of the colour of their skin if they’re able to perform world class athletic feats and win at a sport France enjoys,” said French foreign minister Jean-Yves Le Drian, adding that the same goes for migrants who heroically climb several storeys on the outside of an apartment building to save a baby from falling to his death. “We are proud that France is a multicultural society. Whether your great-great-grandparents were born here, or you scored a magnificent goal to seal our second World Cup win, you are welcome here.”
“Even if you’re not French-French,” he added.
At press time, sources inside French Parliament were debating if the government should undo the economic and social ostracization of first and second generation immigrants that has lead to the creation of impoverished “ghettos” on the outskirts of major cities, but decided to wait and see how the team does in the 2020 Euros.