Local man starting to suspect shiny piece of plastic he bought is not actually bitcoin - The Beaverton

Local man starting to suspect shiny piece of plastic he bought is not actually bitcoin

REGINA – Timothy Bear has started to believe that they may be a slim chance that the 7 inch wide, shiny plastic coin he purchased may not be the piece of crypto that he initially thought.

“I read in the Leader-Post that is created by computers doing thousands and thousands complicated algorithms but I don’t get how computer math could create a piece of plastic” reported Bear, referring to the process by which those who complete the math of keeping the network secure or processing transaction are rewarded with new bitcoins. “But believe it or not I’m not exactly a computer genius.”

Bear paid $600 dollars for a single bitcoin from a woman advertising in the classifieds that identified herself only as Jane. Bear estimates that his single bitcoin is worth around $25,000.00, although he is confused why no articles about bitcoins have pictures of bitcoins that look like his plate sized bitcoin.

“Tim’s so smart with stuff” said Bear’s friend Alfred Jaks. “I know he’s a little scared that he didn’t purchase an authentic bitcoin but if it was fake it wouldn’t have CERTIFIED MONEY printed across it.”

Not all have been as confident in Bear’s financial decision. “This is just like the time he bought a bunch of CD-ROM’s in the 90’s because he thought it was a copy of the internet” said Bear’s daughter Clarissa. “But he seems so happy, I don’t have the heart to tell him it’s fake.”

Bear’s growing suspicion about his bitcoin has led him to search for ways to sell it. “I keep searching for dark web on yahoo but I can’t seem to find it. Maybe this piece of I bought from Canadian Tire might help,” he said while referring to a piece of chain and not the growing list of records, secured and linked using cryptography, that acts as the public ledger for all bitcoin transaction.

At press time Bear sold his bitcoin to Alfred Jaks for the friends rate of $15,000.00