All-white, all-male reboot of “Hidden Figures” in the works - The Beaverton

All-white, all-male reboot of “Hidden Figures” in the works

LOS ANGELES – Production has begun on an all white, male reboot of the hit 2016 movie Hidden Figures. The movie, titled simply, Figures, will tell the story of three caucasian men who don’t have to overcome adversity to work at NASA in racially charged 1960s America.

“We see movies about the accomplishments of black women all the time, like the original ‘Hidden Figures,’ for example,” says writer and director Franz Stillman. “Finally, here’s a story about the white men in the foreground.”

The film follows three NASA engineers, Randy Covington, Charles McHenry IV, and Henry Smith, played by Jake Gyllenhaal, Benedict Cumberbatch, and Matt Damon respectively. The trio rapidly ascends the ranks of the space agency, leaving women and minorities in their wake, as they help America regain the lead in the Space Race against the Russians.

“What’s great about this story is that, unlike the original, these men receive credit for their work right away. Not only that, they are also recognized for the contributions of three black women whose names I forget,” explains Producer Chad Hornley.

It’s not all smooth sailing for Randy Covington (Gyllenhaal), though, who’s Welsh accent attracts mild ribbing from his ethnically English counterparts, causing him to feel a bit down for about a minute.

The film is slated for release in 2018 and is sure to please audiences of all kinds, whether your skin is white, eggshell, or ecru.

At press time, Ryan Gosling’s cameo as Wernher Von Braun, the actual Nazi who worked at NASA for 25 years, is already being hailed as more “Oscar-worthy” than Taraji P. Henson’s.