Chrysler unveils new car that runs entirely on government subsidies - The Beaverton

Chrysler unveils new car that runs entirely on government subsidies

WINDSOR – In an effort to break ground in the automotive industry, unveiled a new model of sedan built in Canada that runs entirely on government funding.

The new design called The Dependent is an innovative vehicle that only burns taxpayer funds and emits no significant damage to corporate profits.

“The new line of sedans are hybrids that can switch from federal money to provincial money,” said Chrysler Canada President Reid Bigland. “The doors and airbags come from tax breaks and the wheels and engine are made from interest-free loans. We were being very financially conscious not to spend one company dime on the design, parts and production.”

The Dependent has a $50 per mile grant consumption rate and only requires an audit once every five years. The car boasts an added feature of corporate executive bonuses and cupholders.

“We hope we will be the leaders in this type of innovation since it’s much easier than selling our cars” Bigland added.

According to sources, Chrysler’s subsidiaries will also release similar lines next year, the Deadbeat and the Grand Guttersnipe.