OTTAWA – Cyclists across the country expressed their deepest apologies today after learning that they weren’t actually allowed to run every red light and stop sign they come across. &…
Tag: bike lanes
Tory assures voters he only needs one more term to make Toronto as inhospitable as it is expensive
TORONTO – Running for re-election Mayor John Tory has promised voters that, with just one more term, he can complete his mission to make Toronto just as terrible to live in as it is crippli…
Perfectionist truck driver circles block looking for right bike lane to park in
TORONTO – Local Fed-Ex driver Martin Bedard has spent the last 20 minutes circling in order to find the exact right bike lane to leave his truck in while he delivers a package. “A lot…
SUV that hit cyclist on way to polls elected councillor in Etobicoke North
TORONTO – In an surprise victory Etobicoke North incumbent Michael Ford has been defeated by an SUV that just hit a cyclist. “It’s been a tough race” stated Ford in his concession speech “b…
Doug Ford invokes War Measures Act to remove Toronto bike lanes
TORONTO – Following his controversial use of the Notwithstanding Clause to interfere with Toronto City Council, Doug Ford has enacted the War Measures Act to dismantle the Bloor bike lane in Toro…
Advocates urge cyclists to use new “Please don’t kill me” hand signal
TORONTO – Cycling safety advocates have developed a new hand signal following a string of fatal accidents on Toronto’s streets. In addition to the existing signals for ‘right’, ‘left’, and …
Ford promises killing Greenbelt will finally allow oil pipeline between Barrie and Oshawa
TORONTO – Showing once again his keen mind for policy, Doug Ford has promised that destroying the Ontario Greenbelt will finally allow the kind of oil pipeline development that Canada has b…
Ottawa installs warning signs for drivers in middle of bike paths
OTTAWA – In an effort to make motorists more aware of new segregated bike lanes, the City of Ottawa has installed large warning signs in the middle of bike lanes at each intersection and at…
EDITORIAL: I wouldn’t mind cyclists if they weren’t so smug about getting maimed and killed
By Herb Fentle Look, cyclists are fine. I get it, you want to exercise, and do it in a way that everyone can see you do it. And you want to make it very clear to the street that you really care a…