MONTRÉAL – Si les montagnes russes tels que le Vertigo, le Maniac ou le Goliath ne vous donnent plus de sueurs froides, La Ronde a un nouveau manège pour vous: le pont Jacques-Cartier. «Ça faisa...
Parros’ mustache fails to break his fall
MONTREAL — Habs enforcer George Parros was released from hospital yesterday after his mustache failed to break his fall during a third period brawl with the Leafs’ Colton Orr. “I spent a l...
NSA asks Americans to eavesdrop on each other during government shutdown
WASHINGTON – With the US government shut down, the National Security Agency is appealing to Americans to monitor the activity and conversations of their family, neighbors, colleagues and foreign looki...
Woman uses optimum points to buy morning after pill
TORONTO – Local woman Laura Daniels was low on cash when she went to Shoppers’ Drugmart to buy emergency contraception, so she decided to use the 50,000 optimum points she had accumulated since finish...
Jack Ryan to avenge Tom Clancy’s death
BALTIMORE – After the passing of renowned author of several espionage and military thrillers, CIA analyst Jack Ryan is vowing revenge on whoever killed him. “Tom was one of my most trusted biogr...
Kingston Pen institutes ‘Adopt-an-Inmate’ program to find prisoners new homes
KINGSTON – Correctional Service Canada has instituted an adoption program to find new prisons for the 494 inmates currently held at Kingston Penitentiary when the facility closes after 178 years...
REPORT: Dudes called ‘Boomer’ nearing extinction
OTTAWA – A report issued yesterday by the International Institute for Endangered Nicknames announced that the global population of dudes nicknamed “Boomer” has reached an all time lo...
Political blizzard closes US government, schools remain open
WASHINGTON – One million US federal employees will stay at home today and possibly longer after Congress announced government closure in the wake of an ongoing nationwide political blizzard. Mar...
City of Montreal bans public places near smokers
MONTREAL – After agreeing that city parks, restaurants and museums are making it increasingly difficult for Montrealers to light up cigarettes without moral hesitation, the Montreal City Council has v...
UofT students shocked to discover white, male authority figure has prejudices
TORONTO – The recent controversial statements of noted author David Gilmour have dumbfounded the students of University of Toronto who had, until that time, intrinsically trusted all Caucasian m...
