OTTAWA – A meeting convened with Canada’s top grocery CEOs to discuss soaring prices stalled this week, as the executives directed Trudeau to conduct his own discussion with their automated…
Politics
Singh announces that he also here
OTTAWA – This week NDP leader Jagmeet Singh called a press conference to announce that he is also a political leader that exists, and presumably has done so for a while. “During this …
New CPC logo just a boner in a cowboy hat
OTTAWA – After a rousing speech by Conservative Party leader Pierre Poilievre at the party’s convention last week, the CPC has unveiled a new logo carefully designed to communicate a strong new m…
Trudeau assures worried Liberal staffers he will remain influential and wealthy after electoral collapse
OTTAWA – With polls showing Conservatives trouncing the federal Liberals in a hypothetical election, Prime Minister Trudeau reassured worried party staffers that he will suffer almost no lo…
Where is he now? Jean Chretien has escaped, Canadians advised to shelter in place
MONTREAL – The RCMP and Canadian Wildlife Service issued a joint statement late Thursday afternoon advising Canadians across the country to shelter in place after it was discovered that for…
Pierre Poilievre threatens to dox one Canadian who lives in a small home every day until he’s made PM
OTTAWA – Inspired by the negative backlash after he shared the address of a random small house that he called “a shack”, Conservative Leader and MP Pierre Poilievre has declared that he wil…
So-called “centrist” doesn’t even know how to pronounce Pierre Poilievre
Ottawa, Ontario – Self-proclaimed political centrist DougieLove4514 recently admitted he couldn’t even pronounce Conservative leader Pierre Poilievre’s name. “I wouldn’t say I belong …
Local woman makes hating Canada her entire personality, wins Alberta election
EDMONTON – A local woman who has made hating Canada her entire personality has become Premier of Alberta after winning the provincial election. Danielle Smith, a lifelong Canadian citizen b…
TTC violence not linked to housing crisis, healthcare funding or the fact I hate Toronto declares Premier Ford
TORONTO – I know that people are looking for someone to blame for the violence on the TTC but I can assure everyone that this is in no way linked to the housing crisis, healthcare funding …
Sikh Community prepares for annual pilgrimage of White politicians to Brampton
BRAMPTON, ON – As Sikhs across Canada look forward to 2023’s Vaisakhi celebrations, volunteers in Brampton are hastily preparing in anticipation for one of their communities most cherished …
