OTTAWA – Finishing out the last of his holiday shopping, former Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has reportedly asked aides how many autographed 8×10 photographs of himself to gift to his new girlfriend, Katy Perry.
“Hmm… they are collectors items, but I also don’t want to be stingy since I have this whole stack of them just sitting here,” the ex-PM mused in his home office as he signed numerous glossy photos, suitable for framing.
Eschewing suggestions from aides to purchase his popstar girlfriend jewelry or perhaps a vacation, Trudeau reportedly insisted that no Christmas season could be complete without a photo of himself and his expertly tousled hair.
While signing his own headshots, Trudeau reportedly insisted they “were still pretty current”, despite the photographs having been taken in 2008.
“I just want her to remember what I look like when she’s not with me,” Trudeau added, pausing for a moment to stare into his own blue eyes.
In a related story, sources report Katy Perry is having trouble on the bespoke song she is writing for new beau Trudeau, as she cannot find a suitable rhyme for “cost of living crisis”.
