More Jets fans taking out second mortgages to pay off single can of beer purchased at Bell MTS Place - The Beaverton
https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:MTS_CENTRE_b.jpg

More Jets fans taking out second mortgages to pay off single can of beer purchased at Bell MTS Place

WINNIPEG – According to survey of Winnipeg’s banks, more fans are applying for second mortgages on their homes to pay for a single can of beer purchased at the concession stand.

“We’ve had over 400 applications for home equity line of credits simply titled ‘yeah, I guess I’ll buy a beer,’” said local RBC branch manager Elouise Ocampo.

One of those applicants, Morris Ratzlaff, was able to afford play-off tickets but not the luxury of in-house beverages.

“After discussing things over with my wife and financial advisor, I will apply for a lump sum loan to purchase one can of Bud at tonight’s game,” said Ratzlaff, a computer programmer who has a three bedroom home in St. Vital. “I think this will be the right decision in the very, very short term.”

For other loyal fans, especially millennials, purchasing 473ml of a lukewarm ale at the concession stand is still out of reach.

“I’m still paying off a school loan,” said 23-year-old Arthur Martin. “It won’t be until 2027 until I’m able to taste that sweet beer that only costs $3 at the LC. I’d have to become a doctor to afford the craft beers.”

At press time, Ratzlaff decided he would forgo the loan and get shitfaced before the game.

Correction: A previous version of this article incorrectly stated that fans can leave the Bell MTS Place during intermission and return. We apologize for the error and have shot the writer.

Want to support The Beaverton? Why not buy a copy of our hilarious first book?