CALGARY – During an outdoor campaign rally security rushed a shaken Pierre Poilievre to safety after he was tragically struck by a lone journalist’s question. “Mr. Poilievre was…
Tag: Pierre Poilievre
Poilievre promises to make microplastics even bigger
MONTREAL – With a week left in the federal election, Conservative leader Pierre Poilievre announced how if Canadians vote for him, he will bring back single use plastic and drastically increase t…
We tried to write a debate analysis, but Jagmeet Singh kept interrupting us
MONTREAL – Despite efforts to reflect on the federal leaders debate for the 2025 election, any analysis was cut short due to repeated interruptions from NDP Leader Jagmeet Singh. The debate…
Mark Carney not sure what he has to do to alienate left-wing voters
“How many times do I need to announce tax cuts or tell Palestinian activists to pound sand before you go back to the NDP?” Luke and the Panel (Ian MacIntyre, Nile Seguin and Jocelyn G…
Conservatives unveil new holding area for journalists attending Poilievre’s rallies
“Anyone who doesn’t talk about how big the crowds are in an erotic way goes in the Iron Maiden!” The Beaverton Weekly Report is back to cover all the top stories, from the tarif…
Poilievre airs new race car ad after being informed he isn’t polling high enough with men going through midlife crises
RANDOM RACE TRACK SOMEWHERE IN CANADA – Conservative leader Pierre Poilievre has launched a new campaign ad featuring him driving a shiny blue Chevrolet Corvette around a race track, after …
Poilievre refuses to believe carbon tax is dead until a body is produced
OTTAWA – Despite Prime Minister Mark Carney announcing that his government would be axing the carbon tax, opposition leader Pierre Poilievre refuses to believe that the dreaded bill is gone…
Poilievre to boost numbers with women by encouraging them to ask their husbands if they can vote for him
“If you ask nicely, maybe he’ll let you use the credit card this weekend too!” The Beaverton Weekly Report is making fun of the news once again. Luke and the Panel (Ian MacIntyr…
Want to buy Canadian? These politicians are up for sale!
In the wake of ongoing tariffs imposed by the Trump Administration, Canadians are looking for local alternatives to American products. For folks hoping to purchase the favour of a government offi…
Conservative man discovers secret trick to getting elected PM: running as Liberal
(Political) Scientists hate him for discovering a new way to be a Conservative PM in Canada! And he can show you how to do it too! It’s the second episode of the relaunched Beaverton Weekly…
