EDMONTON – Honouring those who refused to be vaccinated, newly sworn-in Premier Danielle Smith has called for two minutes of coughing to recognize their overlooked contributions to overwhelming the healthcare system, and spreading disease and death in their wake.
“[The unvaccinated] have been the most discriminated against group that I’ve ever witnessed in my lifetime,” said Smith, who had only met a specific group of conservative straight white people under the age of 65 without a compromised immune system in her lifetime. “Today, we recognize their selfish sacrifice.”
Smith asked those at the swearing in ceremony to kindly remove their hats and face coverings out of respect and begin open-mouthed coughing at anyone and everyone.
“Please think of somebody who was lost to COVID-19 because they heroically refused to consider themselves and others,” barked Smith, whose voice was already hoarse from all the forced coughing.
Smith also announced she will be replacing Chief Medical Officer of Health Deena Hinshaw with a public health team consisting of a pipeline, a piece of coal, and a lit cigarette.