OTTAWA – With the great macroeconomic conflict that pitted Canada against its American foe all but over, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau marked the occasion to remember the veterans of Canada’s Great NAFTA War; the heroic economists who risked their lives in service of free market capitalism.
For 14 months, hundreds of economic, fiscal, and trade analysts served at the frontline cubicles and desks seeing action throughout North America facing harsh conditions such as overtime, cold coffee, and prolonged sitting.
“They fought them at the border crossing spending limits…they fought them on the dairy farms…they fought them in the libraries on intellectual property,” read the PM from a radio broadcast. “They were in supply when their country demanded.”
The Canadians experienced heavy losses at The Battle of Supply Management, but heroically threw their analyses on an integrated auto sector preventing the Americans from reining down a heavy barrage of tariffs.
Facing hostile trade surplus projections from the other side, members of the 12th Fighting Financers pushed back the American assault on Hill Chapter 19 despite dwindling supplies of data.
“Some of these Canadians had to pay with the ultimate externality,” a sombre Trudeau added.
A NAFTA War memorial widget has been erected near the Tomb of the Unknown Economist.
