Andrea Horwath unveils Ontario Liberal’s 2022 election platform - The Beaverton
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Andrea Horwath unveils Ontario Liberal’s 2022 election platform

TORONTO – In a powerful speech, Ontario’s NDP leader Andrea Horwath unveiled her party’s platform for the upcoming 2018 provincial election, which will also serve as the Ontario Liberal’s 2022 election platform, once they inevitably steal all their ideas.

“It is time we present Ontarians with the kind of bold, progressive policies that will seem too radical for them to embrace now, but will be easily accepted once the Liberals regurgitate it in four years,” said Horwath, adding that the Liberals have done this several times before and will certainly do it again.

“We believe Ontarians are ready for change, and once they experience how terrible Doug Ford is, will likely change back to a Liberal Party that seems more dynamic and progressive, refreshed with daring NDP solutions.”

“It’s freeing to present a platform knowing you have absolutely no chance of forming a government,” she added to thunderous applause.

Many had expected Horwath’s party to play it safe, but instead she swung for the fences with big spending commitments like free daycare for parents earning under $40,000.00 a year. Party insiders say this will be undoubtedly welcome news to working class parents once Liberal Premier Charles Sousa, or someone like him, implements the plan in 2023 by taking the platform and hitting CTRL+F to replace “NDP” with “Liberal.”

In related news Doug Ford’s campaign platform is rumoured to include the word “folks” a record 10,000 times.

Image via Flickr