Couple with kids has sex outside of date night - The Beaverton
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Couple with kids has sex outside of date night

WINNIPEG – Friends of Kari and Robert Hern have confirmed the occurrence of unplanned marital sex between the couple last Tuesday.

Sources within Kari’s book club and Rob’s poker circle say that the to 3-year old Caitlyn and 8-year old Joshua seized on an incredibly rare alignment of factors that occurred at exactly 9:18 pm that night including: both being awake and not utterly exhausted, each child having gone to bed at an appropriate time and actually having fallen asleep, both having bathed in the preceding 12 hours, neither being crushed under urgent work deadlines, and not having had any of the simmering resentments accumulated during their 10-year marriage flare up during the preceding week.   

“Chances of unplanned sexual intimacy of this sort amongst parents of young children is vanishingly low,” confirmed University of Manitoba sociology professor Dr. Allison Miller, comparing it to the perfect storm of errors that must occur in order for a major airliner to crash given modern safety systems.

This week, friends report that Kari’s parents have arrived to visit from Lethbridge and the couple are not currently speaking to each other outside of feigned politeness at mealtimes.