SAN FRANCISCO – Tech giant Apple has announced that their new iPhone 6 and the iPhone 6 Plus will both come pre-loaded with exclusive software to let you know when the iPhone 7 will be released.
“No longer will you have to wait years for your phone to feel useless and outdated,” said Apple CEO Tim Cook. “With the iCountdown app, that gnawing inadequacy will be with you from the first moment you have your iPhone 6.”
According to Cook, the new app will let users know where the iPhone 7 is during it’s development, manufacture, shipping and announcement stages, all preset with calendar reminders for consumers on when to “make idle conversation about the release of the iPhone 7,” when to “get irrationally excited,” when to “start lining up outside an Apple store” and finally when to “throw away your obsolete iPhone 6.”
“The app will also administer small electric shocks when it determines that a user is not properly excited about the iPhone 7,” explained Cook. “Some might call that inhumane, but those people probably still use the iPhone 4.”
Apple fans were ecstatic and took to social media to praise the company’s first app for their new product.
“I can’t wait to dump this shit iPhone 5 and buy the iPhone 6 so I will know exactly when I can get rid of that crap. #amazing” one user wrote on Twitter.
At press time Blackberry had announced their new phones will include a countdown app telling users exactly when the company will declare bankruptcy.
