MEN’S WASHROOM – According to a recent report from the men’s washroom, the middle urinal is very, very thirsty. While it is a perfectly functional toilet — much like its left and right counterpa…
Tag: health
Man with exposed brain tissue still not convinced he needs to see doctor
TORONTO — Local mechanic Jason Pringle is refusing to seek medical attention after sustaining a severe head wound that has left a portion of his brain exposed. “It’s nothing, really. I’d just be …
Good night’s sleep allows woman to be more present in her shitty life
HAMILTON, ON – The secret to being fully present in your miserable existence? Local life coach, June Funda, says it’s all about prioritizing a good night’s sleep. “It’s hard to focus on how ever…
Where are they now: “Don’t you put it in your mouth” puppet checks into rehab
VANCOUVER – Representatives for the female Sister Puppet from the popular 1992 Concerned Children’s Advertisers PSA “Don’t you put it in your mouth” have confirmed that the puppet has check…