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We sat down with Doug Ford’s main...

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National
- National
- Local
- Toronto
- Montreal
- Vancouver
- North
- Campus
- University Reviews
- Canada Votes 2015
Federal government announces O Canada will now begin with 15 seconds of unskippable ads

Trudeau assures Liberals they just need to ride out this 28 month polling dip

Brits replace their right wing party with centrist party for same reasons Canadians will soon replace our centrist party with right wing party

Wealthy Canadians announce BMW X3 convoy to protest capital gains tax hike

Forest Hill by-election to show Canada what people without problems think

See you later! Neurodivergent friend discovers crocheting

Canadian man reading date never knows which is day and which is month unless day is above 12

Man with dedicated folder for ‘back of the head’ selfies definitely not balding

Proposed names for Toronto’s new WNBA team

Amazing! Bald eagles seen living in Toronto with zero roommates!

Toronto Police advise banks to leave big pile of money at the door to avoid being robbed

Eglinton LRT builders mail ransom note, severed piece of track, to Torontonians

Just for Laughs Festival files for bankruptcy protection just before jumping out of box wearing gorilla mask

Montreal rioters concerned COVID rules are destroying small businesses before they can destroy small businesses

Toppling of statue causes temporal rift as John A. MacDonald erased from history

Montreal halts road construction until everyone can enjoy it again

Report: Killer Whales actively preparing to bring down a plane

Vancouver considers buying a second snowplow

Vancouver actor moves to L.A. to improve odds of getting cast in shows that shoot in Vancouver

Vancouver removes tents from Eastside unless they can prove they’re a weed shop

Tied Yukon election to be decided by traditional chainsaw throw

Yukon exposed to 2 cases of assholes

Yukon refuses to change clocks back in smug defiance of the will of Demeter

Rest of Canada happy to exchange NWT election results for federal one

York Professor asks for a note from a dictator before agreeing to defer student’s exam

Queen’s students argue their campus outbreak will be way better than Western’s

Gaming the system: Recent 92-year-old university grad gets to die before she pays off her debt

Western University invites David Wooderson from “Dazed and Confused” to speak at convocation

Western University mandate 3 vaccine shots, 15 Jaegermeister shots

Acadia University: The Beaverton University Reviews

Dalhousie University: The Beaverton University Reviews

OCAD University: University Reviews 2014

NDP claim Liberals stole their idea to form majority government

Sun newspapers still reporting Harper majority

90-year-old who has never voted proudly casts first ballot for Social Credit party

Conservatives unveil last minute attack ad accusing Justin of supporting Kansas City
World
Canadians fail to notice difference as global IT outage disrupts airlines, banks, health care

Man angry about 15-minute cities wouldn’t last a day in Europe’s 15-minute countries

Report: Protestor encampment at McGill still cleaner than student residences

Trudeau startled by UK news that long-standing, deeply-unpopular governments must eventually hold elections

Trump campaign desperately hoping Democrats replace Biden with a different frail 81-year-old

UNPRECEDENTED: Aging boomer retires to free up job for someone younger

Biden assures Democrats COVID diagnosis won’t stop him from losing election

Report: Whatever you need to do to mentally prepare yourself for a second Trump Presidency, go ahead and get started

Living History: Grandma exchanged letters with John Diefenbaker where he talks about his “Dief Beef”

Toppling of statue causes temporal rift as John A. MacDonald erased from history

Village virgin sick of donating blood to every ritual sacrifice

July 24th, 1967: French President De Gaulle calls for Quebec to surrender, await for international help for liberation
Sports
- Sports
Man running through streets of Paris holding Olympic torch accidentally triggers massive revolt

Top 5 Olympic sports to watch this year that aren’t nearly as good as Winter ones

Franchise with amazing fans, likeable superstars determined to become league villains

Canada looks to break humiliating 106-year South American soccer championship drought
Business
- Business
Loblaws introduces new “Bread Price-Fixing Settlement” fee to all customers

Video game exec just 10 layoffs away from unlocking “Decimated Industry” achievement

WestJet introduces $25 fee every time Canadians say “WestJet” out loud

Man shocked to discover product in parents’ home not manufactured by Kirkland
Culture
- Culture
- Lifestyle
- Health
- Opinion
- Parenting
- Stats
- Classifieds
Inside Out 3 to feature controversial new emotion, Diarrhea

Jeopardy brings back worst performing contestants for “Tournament of Dolts”

Kids nominated for Drake’s Choice Award

Sad about Alice Munro’s death? Here are 5 Alice Munro short stories that will make you way sadder

Wild Gen Z prom party wraps up at 9:15 pm

Extreme home makeover? This man washed his sheets

Boy realises the magic really was in that amulet and not inside him in the slightest

Luxury porta-potty includes chemical bidet

Québec language inspectors check that patients are dying in French

Op-Ed: 30 days without Loblaws: how it improved my skin, digestion, and sex life

BREAKING: Makers of 9-in-1 body wash admit it’s just laundry detergent

4 hangover cures that aren’t as good as playing Home for a Rest by beloved Canadian folk rock band Spirit of the West at full volume

Editorial: Five ways to use your huge bazongas as literal weapons in the Woke War, by the National Post

Editorial: Women must date unpleasant men, and we’re not just saying that because we’re unpleasant men

You fucking Leafs fans still think I’m the worst Defenceman you’ve ever seen?

Is Buffy Ste Marie actually Indigenous? Six extremely white people weigh in

Child abuse? This baby is wearing jeans

Toddler guzzling bathwater like Nero at Bacchanal in waning days of Roman Empire

5 tips for betting on NHL preseason games while your whiny children beg you for attention

EDITORIAL: Why I’m not letting my kids use social media except the YouTube channel they star in that pays our mortgage

93% of Canadians will never pay off their blood debts

86% of August e-mail traffic just duelling Out-Of-Office messages

2014 Canadian Federal Budget Preview

Most frequent lies found on online dating profiles

Missed Connections: You were the public urinator on Main and 5th

LOTS OF JARS FULL OF APRICOT PITS.

ESSAY WRITERS NEEDED ASAP. BIG MONEY $$$$$.

UNIVERSITY student seeking mannequin to come alive and be my girlfriend.
BeavFeed
Five people you hope are not on the Epstein list

Free speech champions explain why it’s OK that people are being cancelled for criticizing Israel

Devastating: Woman forgets “R” in email to Pedro

Most popular TV show in each Province

You’re Jason Kenney. Can you find an excuse to get out of going to Calgary Pride?

You just lit off a bunch of fireworks before realizing you were in the Art Gallery of Ontario. Can you save the priceless pieces of art?

You magically turned into a bug! Can you live a happy and fulfilling life?

You have a chance to punch a Nazi. Do you take it?

Quiz: Should you watch Barbie, Oppenheimer or 2008 Canadian WWI drama Passchendaele

Quiz: Who should you vote for in Toronto’s Mayoral Race

Quiz: Who should you vote for in the Alberta Provincial Election

QUIZ: Is it a pyramid scheme or just a regular cult?

Free speech champions explain why it’s OK that people are being cancelled for criticizing Israel

Conservatives explain why Pierre Poilievre attacking ‘globalist elites’ isn’t antisemitic

Liberals explain why they can’t do anything about the housing crisis

Canadians react to Pierre Poilievre’s “sexy” makeover

How To Go Vegan…Next Week

Guide To: Edmonton

Guide To: St.John’s

How To Lose Weight
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News In Photo, Ontario

We sat down with Doug Ford’s main Greenbelt lobbyist/ Spirit Halloween mafioso costume model, Phoenix Kiss

September 3, 2023 by Ian MacIntyre ( @mrianmacintyre )

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