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The Bravest Television Show On Air?

National
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Meet the Air Canada passenger left on the same plane for the past 15 years

Report: Ford gov actually shut down to avoid mockery from new episodes of Beaverton tv show

Liberals declare climate change emergency for a few hours before approving pipeline

Oh no! Kawhi Leonard is now King of the North and he has no idea how to give legislation Royal Assent!

Woman who gave stranger directions spotted frantically checking Google Maps two minutes later

Local woman adds additional book on productivity to impressive collection of half-read books on productivity

Millennial lottery winner excited to finally quit one of his five jobs

Caledon teen debates pawning grandparent’s Royal Canadian Mint collection to pay for coke

Doug Ford demands officer who carded Masai Ujiri be allowed to march in Raptors parade

Most affordable apartments in Toronto revealed to be bathroom stalls in club

Doug Ford announces new Toronto subway lines, cancels them before end of conference

Last person to use Toronto’s Union Station pre-construction dies of old age

Still searching for buyer, Montreal Alouettes now listed as fully furnished

New law requires Quebec to show its racism visibly

Montreal riots after Boston loss

Groundbreaking Montreal artist shocks community by changing ‘Arrêt’ sign to ‘Art’

Local woman can’t find anything she owns despite living in 200 sq. ft. micro apartment

Rest of country to Vancouver: We get it, you have good sushi

Parents trying to decipher alternative school’s crystal-based report cards

Vancouver city council approves plan to extend SkyTrain vertically

Conservation officers safely tranquilize municipal elections candidate wandering through neighbourhood

Dempster Highway to be renamed after bread company’s sponsorship ends

Dawson City River fountain deemed a success

Whitehorse grandfather from 2075 regales grandchildren about surviving with only 2 Starbucks locations

Western University invites David Wooderson from “Dazed and Confused” to speak at convocation

Low-income student receiving free tuition to be given Ontario’s $348 billion debt next year

University-aged Buck-a-Beer connoisseurs taste the subtle hints of intoxication

University anarchist group demands dedicated unsafe space

Acadia University: The Beaverton University Reviews

Dalhousie University: The Beaverton University Reviews

OCAD University: University Reviews 2014

Ryerson University: The Beaverton University Reviews

NDP claim Liberals stole their idea to form majority government

Sun newspapers still reporting Harper majority

90-year-old who has never voted proudly casts first ballot for Social Credit party

Conservatives unveil last minute attack ad accusing Justin of supporting Kansas City
World
Belize changes national anthem to ‘Belize It or Not, I’m Walking on Air’

Trump fails to notice that Royals sent cast of “The Crown” to greet him

Volunteer announces plan to build white saviour complex in Africa

Modern-day Nazi hunter thought job would be harder

Malnourished toddler relieved to hear he’s not technically in a concentration camp

Sarah Sanders looking forward to spending more time lying to her family

Joe Biden campaign begs parents to stop letting their children interact with Joe Biden

Trump fails to notice that Royals sent cast of “The Crown” to greet him

July 24th, 1967: French President De Gaulle calls for Quebec to surrender, await for international help for liberation

Portraits of Canadiocity: Martin Luther King Jr

Canadians Learn About Gandhi and Serial Killer Gilles de Rais

September 28, 1972: Paul Henderson’s goal causes World War III
Sports
- Sports
Still searching for buyer, Montreal Alouettes now listed as fully furnished

World in shock after better team wins

Kawhi Leonard celebrates by staring at different wall

Update: Fuck hockey
Business
- Business
Canada’s Wonderland opens tallest, longest rollercoaster line on Earth

YouTube warns white nationalist groups promoting race war that videos better not violate copyright

Woman warns coworker of clogged toilet like she shielding rookie officer from mangled corpse

BuzzFeed publishes correction after inaccurately reporting several things only 90’s kids understand
Culture
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- Lifestyle
- Health
- Opinion
- Parenting
- Stats
- Classifieds
- Comics
Unimaginative Alice in Wonderland School play contains total lack of psychedelic drugs

Morrissey reveals The Smiths song “This Charming Man” about David Duke

Fans angry Game of Thrones ended with all contenders saying “good game” and slapping hands

John Wick 3 Review: Is this, like, feminism?

Woman killed by monster after realizing running is worse than death

Hacked psychic website compromises millions of users’ tarot card information

Two weeks into diet, popcorn ceiling looking a little too delicious

Makeup-free woman actually is pretty tired, thank you for noticing

Insurance industry warns that single-payer pharmacare could reduce their access to our money

Zombie therapist wants patients to know that they can’t keep running from their problems

Anti-vax protest cancelled due to measles outbreak

“Aspartame is bad for you,” says friend who just snorted gigantic line of ketamine

Take it from me, an opinion columnist with no expertise, the MMIWG Commission’s use of the term genocide is wrong

Editorial: It’s time we think about canceling babies

Coconut oil can solve any problem, and yes I’d like to sell you some

What the hell are YOU looking at?!

Children impressed, sad at how much Dad knows about Transformers

If I do not inculcate ideals of violence and aggression in my son, how will he appreciate cowboy movies?

Baby never happier than when vomiting

Sleep-deprived parent fondly remembers days of being sleep-deprived raver

86% of August e-mail traffic just duelling Out-Of-Office messages

2014 Canadian Federal Budget Preview

Most frequent lies found on online dating profiles

What are you dressing up as for Halloween?

LOTS OF JARS FULL OF APRICOT PITS.

ESSAY WRITERS NEEDED ASAP. BIG MONEY $$$$$.

UNIVERSITY student seeking mannequin to come alive and be my girlfriend.

Bob the Angry Flower: Press This

Bob the Angry Flower: Revolt

Bob the Angry Flower: Rhetorical

Bob the Angry Flower: Bank Job
BeavFeed
Quiz: Do you trust priests again, or are you watching Fleabag Season 2?

Oh no! Kawhi Leonard is now King of the North and he has no idea how to give legislation Royal Assent!

Scientists taught this bear to mimic facial expressions but in a mean way

Productivity Hack: find one thing you want to do each day and then really hate yourself if you don’t do it

You’re Jason Kenney. Can you find an excuse to get out of going to Calgary Pride?

You just lit off a bunch of fireworks before realizing you were in the Art Gallery of Ontario. Can you save the priceless pieces of art?

You magically turned into a bug! Can you live a happy and fulfilling life?

You have a chance to punch a Nazi. Do you take it?

Quiz: Do you trust priests again, or are you watching Fleabag Season 2?

QUIZ: Oh God, what now?

Quiz: Hey you look like a smart person, do you want the chance to work for yourself and be your own boss?

QUIZ: Can you name any of the newly elected United States congresswomen and why not?

10 things Doug Ford has already used the notwithstanding clause on

6 rugs that are actually just clothes you left on the floor

5 effortless pottery overalls worn by calmer women than you

These 5 people now live in P.E.I. because they couldn’t pay the $47 Confederation Bridge toll

How To Go Vegan…Next Week

Guide To: Edmonton

Guide To: St.John’s

How To Lose Weight
Video
- Videos
- Full Episodes
Woman dressed like it’s -5°c and man dressed like it’s +40°c meet for lunch

Parks Canada offering photo editing for people who want to look like they went camping

Canadians abroad continue to deny knowledge of “Steve from Canada”

Blizzard Not Going To Stop Man From Barbecuing Mediocre Steak

Watch: Season 2, Episode 13

Watch: Season 2, Episode 12
Podcasts
- The Beaverton Weekly Report
Trans activists make absurd demand to be treated like human beings

Doug Ford demands Green Party apologize for letting Oshawa GM Plant close

St. Michael’s principal promises to restore school to acceptable levels of toxic masculinity

The Beaverton will pay whatever it takes to not see Tony Clement’s dick
The Book
Workshops

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The Bravest Television Show On Air?

November 13, 2018 by Staff

So very brave…

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Update: Fuck hockey

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Woman dressed like it’s -5°c and man dressed like it’s +40°c meet for lunch

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