MONTREAL – Local Habs fan Jeff Donoghue says he needs just a few more training sessions before he is in mid-season trash talking shape. “Other off-seasons I’ve kind of let my ga…
Tag: Oilers
Report: Team that lost in 7 to Stanley Cup finalist must be blown up, team that lost in 4 to other finalist in great shape
DENVER – As the Stanley Cup Finals kicks off in Denver hockey experts agree that the Edmonton Oilers, who were swept by the finalist Avs, are ready to make a great run next year while the T…
Flames head coach starting to think team should cover this McDavid guy
EDMONTON – Ahead of Game 4 Calgary Flames head coach Darryl Sutter unveiled a secret plan to actually play defense against Oilers forward Connor McDavid. “Our strategy of just letting…
Referendum asks Albertans if they want to stop equalization payments, whether they’d like to be able to fly
CALGARY – Albertans are headed to the polls today to make an important determination of whether they want to change the Canadian constitution to get rid of equalization payments, and if the…
Justin Trudeau forces Edmonton Oilers to change name to Edmonton Wind Turbines
EDMONTON – In an effort to combat climate change, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has forced the Edmonton NHL team to change its name from the Oilers to the Wind Turbines. “This is the centra…
Leafs fans think team should trade their bad players for other teams’ good players
TORONTO – With the NHL offseason in full swing Leafs fans have begun engaging in their usual speculation and prognostication concerning how the team could make itself better by trading some…
Leafs finally discover key to success: not being in same division as Boston
TORONTO – Having started the 2021 NHL season with a record of 6-2 the ever disappointing Toronto Maple Leafs believe they have finally found what works for them: no longer having to play th…
City of Edmonton offers to pay for Flames’ new arena in exchange for naming rights to ‘Eat Shit Calgary’ Place
EDMONTON – After more than two years of failed negotiations between the city of Calgary and the Calgary Sport and Entertainment Corporation (CSEC) over funding of a new arena for the Calgary Flam…
Police background check clears Bryzgalov to work with children, Edmonton Oilers
EDMONTON – Part-time goalie and full-time astronomer Ilya Bryzgalov is now able to make his first start for the Edmonton Oilers, after a police background check cleared him to play with Chi…