TORONTO – Bryce Feegan, a “die-hard” Leafs fan has proclaimed that the team is sure to win the Cup after their victory in Game 2 with the same amount of certainty as he declared…
Tag: Featured Post
Elon Musk building an AI that can explain to him why no one likes him
SAN FRANCISCO – Elon Musk announced this week that he’s developing an AI called TruthGPT in the hopes that the finished product will be able to answer what he believes to be the most pressi…
I don’t care how many scandals my free vacations cause, I can’t spend any more time on Tripadvisor
By Justin Trudeau So apparently some of you are mad because me and the fam jam took another free vacation at one of my dad’s buddies’ places. You’re wondering how in the hell I …
Hospitals dropping mask mandates tell patients to stay home if they feel unwell
HAMILTON – The McMaster University Children’s Hospital, along with several other facilities in Southwestern Ontario, announced today that they’re lifting their mask mandates, noting because…
Leafs fans attending playoff opener given special blue and white coloured stress ball
TORONTO – Fans may be shelling out thousands for seats to the Leafs playoff opener tonight but they won’t be heading home empty handed now that the club has announced that every atten…
World’s sick, injured travel to see NHL team doctors after they miraculously heal entire rosters in time for playoffs
LAS VEGAS – People with injuries and illnesses that conventional doctors have been unable to hear have begun making medical pilgrimages to see NHL team doctors after hearing how they were a…
Man whose dick you have to suck to get a drink around here finally identified: Marty Williams of Scarborough
SCARBOROUGH — After decades of the question being asked by frustrated bar patrons, the identity of the man whose dick you have to suck to get a drink around here has been definitively identified …
Rogers Centre renovations include private nook where fans can tell Blue Jays mascot everything they can’t say to their dad
TORONTO – As the Toronto Blue Jays play the 2023 season’s first home games, fans are enjoying several offseason additions to the Rogers Centre, including a new bullpen bar, a large family play ar…
Québec reluctantly turns power back on for immigrants and Anglos
MONTREAL – After a million households lost electricity last week due the second once-in-a-lifetime ice storm most Quebeckers have faced in their lifetimes, Hydro Québec is reluctantly turni…
Pope decrees that every Friday is a Good Friday when you’re hanging with your buds
VATICAN CITY – Supreme Pontiff Pope Francis has marked the holiest week on the Christian calendar by reminding Catholics worldwide that it’s important to kick it with your pals. “On Good Friday, …
