Tag: Department of Homeland Security

Homeland Security assures Americans they’re grabbing Portland protesters off street for cool frat hazing

PORTLAND, OR – After reports of unidentified federal agents pulling protesters off the street and into unmarked vans, the US Department of Homeland Security has assured citizens the snatchi…

Trump to replace outgoing DHS Secretary Nielsen with printed-out Breitbart articles

WASHINGTON, D.C. — With the announcement that Secretary Kirstjen Nielsen will step down from her role, President Trump has announced her replacement to oversee the the Department of Homelan…