Prince George, BC – Local man Ed Doherty has coached an entire NHL hockey game seemingly unaware that the Vancouver Canucks players, coaches or referees cannot hear him.
The 54-year-old began spouting advice to the television set just before the puck dropped some 700 km away in Edmonton in an effort to inspire his team.
Calls to “Cover the point! For Chrissakes!”, “Shoot! Shoot! Shoot!” and “Quicker line changes, boys!” remained unanswered from the team and coaching staff throughout the game. The team was also oblivious to his advice to cover “that son-of-a-bitch McDavid.”
Family members reported that Doherty burst into profanities when Vancouver Canucks Markus Granlund’s goal was disallowed for goaltender interference, but his appeal was ignored as his HD television set has no ability to transmit feedback directly to the referee.
During the first intermission, the father of three adult children also provided some insightful commentary during Hockey Night in Canada. However, neither Don Cherry or Ron Maclean responded to his colourful commentary or even Doherty’s compliment towards Cherry’s suit.
After losing the lead twice, a frustrated Doherty began to question the value of player’s contracts – particularly the Sedin twins – in a futile effort to get the pair to play better. “$7 million a year for dragging your ass up and down the ice?” asked the enraged man sitting from his couch about Henrik Sedin to no one in particular. “We need to trade this useless Swede for someone better.”
At press time, Doherty was crediting the 3-2 shoot-out victory to all of the coaching decisions he would have made.
