ASHTABULA, OH – Ashtabula middle school students left on a field trip to Toronto this morning in an effort to see the northern nation’s capital city.
“I’ll tell ya, it’s more than just foreigners and Blue Jays baseball up there,” vice-principal Dale Saxton said. “The students will see where the Canada government makes their…their laws and where Stephen Mar…, where the President of Canada, where his house is.”
Saxton added, “I’m as excited as they are. Toronto is also known as a city of monuments.”
Though most students were excited about the trip, 13-year-old Emily Bauer expressed some concern: “I tried telling (Principal) Saxton that Ottawa is the capital, but he just nodded and agreed ‘yeah, we oughta walk in the capitol’”
“Saxton is such a fucking moron,” she added. “He’s probably expecting to hear a lot of French up there.”
