LEICESTER, ENGLAND – Family members of the descendants that brutally cut down King Richard III during the Battle of Bosworth Field were ecstatic to receive the 561-year-old monarch’s skeleton as a trophy.
“Our family has waited a very long time for this,” said one of the last direct descendants, Adrian Hempstead, while flaunting the former king’s forearm. “I thought our family would never get the reward we deserved.”
The University of Leicester Archeology Services decided to respect the medieval tradition by offering the body to the rightful victor and his descendants so that the body may be drawn and quartered before the unlucky skull is placed on a stake.
“This skull will look pretty chic with my new lamp,” Hempstead observed as he placed a small candle into the eye sockets.
