OTTAWA – In a sign of respect, politicians of all stripes have promptly changed their opinion of their now deceased colleague from negative to positive.
“He was a great man,” lied a fellow lawmaker who had previously called him a self-serving ass and blatantly corrupt. “This country will truly miss a remarkable man who dedicated his life to politics.”
Other elected officials throughout the country sent messages of condolences and flowers to his family since his passing instead of the insults and swift kicks to the crotch they were planning on sending had he been alive.
“We may have had our disagreements,” announced an opposing politician who once promised to dance on his grave. “But he was determined to serve the public good his strong moral convictions.”
Thirty-eight years in all three levels of government is an incredibly feat,” added the same politician who, hours before learning of his death, hoped that the late legislator would drop dead already.
According to sources, a close colleague was busy writing some spectacular fabrications and half-truths for his eulogy.
