Anti-spam legislation prompts new program to retrain penis enlargement spammers for door-to-door service - The Beaverton

Anti-spam legislation prompts new program to retrain penis enlargement spammers for door-to-door service

OTTAWA – Canada’s new anti- legislation has put thousands of enlargement spammers out of work, prompting a new workers’ rights group to start a campaign to retrain them for door-to-door sales.

“You don’t just let an industry die out,” said Jessica Roman, lead coordinator of the program. “These people provide a service to society, like doctors or policemen. We wouldn’t let those jobs get wiped out because of some silly government legislation.”

Carl Digby, who was a star spammer who worked for several Bulgarian pharmacies earning $18,000 a year until he lost his audience, has taken the program and is now working as a door-to-door spammer.

“Women love big penises!” Rottman yelled to a middle aged woman after she opened her door. “Get the pump that your doctor doesn’t want you to know about. Also selling , . Very cheap.”

At press time, Rottman was stuffing mailboxes with chain letters and a confident letter from a Nigerian King who will offer you $5 million dollars if he can access your bank account number.

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