Local man concerned that if he starts kissing horses, then where will it stop? - The Beaverton

Local man concerned that if he starts kissing horses, then where will it stop?

BIGGAR, SK – After an unexpectedly intimate moment with his prize-winning mare, Danziger, local businessman and breeder Wayland Price said that he feels, “uncomfortable.”

“Well, Danziger had just won silver at the local 4-H show, and I was walking her down to the concession stand to get her a carrot. I guess we were both feeling pretty elated,” Price said to a gathering of the press this Tuesday.

“I laughed at something, and sort of swayed in toward her, and then the next thing I knew, I was inches away from her face. I found myself thinking, ‘Is this really happening?’ Well, the moment passed, and we were just breeder and prize mare again. But I can’t stop wondering, ‘What if?’ you know? What if I had actually kissed that horse?’

“It’s not that I want to kiss my horse,” Price added. “It’s just that we were caught up in the moment.”

Nevertheless, Price described himself as ‘gravely concerned’ by the incident and despondently begged of the press “What if it happens again? What if I actually go through with it next time? Then what happens to my life?”

The incident is not the first time that Price has been confronted with his own curiosity. In 2004, Price confirmed that he had a “brief, shameful flirtation with feeding [his] wife bits of carrot and apple while she slept.”

Price concluded the press conference by asking all in attendance to “not tell anyone what I am,” before hanging his head and muttering to himself, “Christ, I’m turning into my father.’