SAANICH, BC - Elizabeth May, leader of the Green Party of Canada, was excited last Tuesday to finally find a seat. May reported that she is incredibly thankful, since her unfurnished house had gone without a sitting apparatus since she bought it in 2006.
“It is a good day for me, for the Green Party, and for Canada,” May reported. “I can finally sit down. God, the floor was just so uncomfortable.”
May had sought a chair for many years, but was unable to due to her environmental concerns. Chair production is incredibly high in carbon emissions, and the wood used to make them involves the deforestation of valuable Canadian wilderness.
This chair, however, was different.
“I found it on the side of the road,” May continued. “It looked like someone had already got their full use out of it, so I reasoned that taking it would prevent it from being another casualty of our wasteful society.”
“I’m very happy for May,” opposition leader Jack Layton agreed. “Especially because she told me how stiff her ankles get all the time.”
Prime Minister Stephen Harper expressed his congratulations to May on her new chair and has said that he is fine with her bringing it into parliament, so long as she doesn’t talk too much.
But when the Green Party Leader expressed her desire for a second chair - so she could have guests over - the Prime Minister burst into laughter.